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哥林多前书生命读经 · 第41篇

对付婚姻的生活（一）

Dealing with marriage life (1)
1读经：哥林多前书七章一至四十节。在林前七章一至四十节保罗来到这封书信所对付的第五个难处，就是婚姻的事。这是照著前段（六12～20）所立的原则处理的。
1Scripture Reading: 1 Cor. 7:1-40 In 7:1-40 Paul comes to the fifth problem dealt with in this Epistle—the matter of marriage. This is treated according to the principles established in the preceding section (6:12-20
2许多时候，最有文化的人，就是在婚姻生活中难处最多的人。简单而没有文化的人，也许没有这么多婚姻的难处。你若研究美国与离婚有关的统计数字，就会发现离婚很高的比率是在受过高等教育和有专业的人中间。似乎人受的教育越多，离婚的可能性就越大。因为哥林多人很热中于文化和哲学，他们就有许多关于婚姻的问题。保罗在七章答覆这些问题。林前七章一节这样开始：『关于你们所写的。』这指明哥林多人写信给保罗论到不同的事，包括婚姻。在哥林多的信徒有许多问题，因为他们崇尚哲学。他们用哲学研究每件事。然而，用哲学研究婚姻生活很危险，因为这能导致分居甚或离婚。倪弟兄曾劝我们，我们结婚以后，对配偶应当眼瞎。我们若这样作，就会享受婚姻生活。但我们若以批评、哲学的方式来看丈夫或妻子，就会有严重的难处。分析我们的婚姻生活，就是用哲学研究婚姻。我们不该分析婚姻生活，只该享受婚姻生活，为著主所赐给我们的配偶赞美祂并感谢祂。我们越这样赞美主，就越享受婚姻生活。
2Many times those who are most cultured are the ones who have the most problems in married life. Those who are simple and uncultured may not have as many marriage problems. If you study the statistics related to divorces in this country, you will find that a large percentage of divorces is among those who are highly educated and among professional people. It seems that the more educated a person is, the greater is the possibility of divorce. Because the Corinthians were so devoted to their culture and philosophy, they had many questions about marriage. Paul answers these questions in chapter seven. First Corinthians 7:1 begins in this way: “Now concerning the things of which you wrote.” This indicates that the Corinthians had written to Paul about various matters, including marriage. The believers at Corinth had many questions because they were philosophical. They philosophized about everything. It is dangerous, however, to philosophize about our married life, for this can lead to separation or even divorce. Brother Nee once advised us that after we get married, we should be blind regarding our spouse. If we do this, we shall enjoy married life. But if we are watchful over our husband or wife in a critical, philosophical way, we shall have serious problems. To analyze our married life is to philosophize concerning marriage. Instead of analyzing our married life, we should simply enjoy it, praising the Lord and thanking Him for the spouse He has given us. The more we praise the Lord in this way, the more we shall enjoy married life
3可能所有已婚的人都花过一些时间分析婚姻。我们也许对自己说过：『我与这人结婚真是出于主么？可能我太受别人影响了。也许我那时应该等一下。』我们若诚实，就会承认我们问过这样的问题。这些问题产生，因为我们里面深处不完全满意我们的婚姻生活。正如每个基督徒都曾疑惑他的得救，照样，每个已婚的人对婚姻生活也曾有疑惑。我当然不鼓励你疑惑你的婚姻生活；我不过指出事实：疑惑似乎是无可避免的，尤其在受过教育和有高度文化的人中间。
3Probably all those who are married have spent some time analyzing their marriage. We may have said to ourselves, “Was it really of the Lord that I marry this one? Perhaps I was influenced too much by others. Maybe I should have waited a little longer.” If we are honest, we shall admit that we have asked questions such as these. These questions arise because, deep within, we are not wholly satisfied with our married life. Just as every Christian has had doubts concerning his salvation, so every married person has had doubts about married life. Of course, I do not encourage you to question your married life. I am simply pointing out the fact that questions seem to be unavoidable, especially among those who are educated and highly cultured.
壹 基本原则
I. BASIC PRINCIPLES
4研读保罗在本章对婚姻生活的处理，最好的方法就是来看基本原则。我信这是领会七章所论许多要点最好的方法。
4The best way to approach Paul’s treatment of married life in this chapter is to consider the basic principles. I believe that this is the best way to understand the many points covered in chapter seven
一 男不近女倒好
A. Good for a Man Not to Touch a Woman
5第一个基本原则见于一节。在本节保罗说，『男不近女倒好。』这在于从神得来的恩赐。（7。）
5The first basic principle is found in verse 1. In this verse Paul says, “It is good for a man not to touch a woman.” This depends upon the gift from God (v. 7
二 专心祷告
B. Devoting Ourselves to Prayer
6保罗在五节向已婚的信徒说，『你们不可彼此亏负，除非出于同意，暂时分房，为要专心祷告，以后仍要同房，免得撒但因你们不能自制，试诱你们。』专心，直译，有闲，有空；因此，是致力于的意思。祷告要求我们不受人事物的影响。那要求我们暂时离开配偶的祷告，必定是特别且重大的。
6Speaking to married believers, Paul says in verse 5, “Do not deprive each other, except by agreement for a time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer and again be together, that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” The Greek word rendered devote literally means have leisure, be free for; hence, to give oneself to. Prayer requires that we be free from persons, matters, and things. Any prayer that requires staying away from the spouse for a time must be special and heavy
7婚姻生活常打岔我们祷告，妨碍我们祷告的生活，甚至可能使我们全然不能祷告。但也有些特别的事例，是夫妻在祷告生活上彼此相助的。然而，婚姻多半打岔祷告的生活。
7Married life often distracts us from prayer and interferes with our prayer life. It may even keep us from praying altogether. However, there are unusual cases where a husband and wife help one another in the prayer life. But for the most part, marriage is a distraction from the prayer life
三 不给撒但机会
C. Giving No Occasion to Satan
8在五节保罗警告已婚的人，不要因不能自制，受撒但试诱。那试诱者撒但，一直埋伏著，要掳获信徒。信徒不能自制，就会给撒但机会这样作。
8In verse 5 Paul warns the married ones not to be tempted by Satan because of their lack of self-control. The tempter, Satan, is crouching to capture the believers. Their lack of self-control may give him the opportunity to do this
四 在于我们从神得来的恩赐
D. Depending upon the Gift We Have Received from God
9在七节保罗说，『我愿意众人都像我一样；只是各人都有自己从神得来的恩赐，有人是这样，有人是那样。』使徒保罗既这样绝对为著主和主的经纶，他就愿意众人都像他一样。他愿他们不嫁不娶，像他一样，（8，）使他们也能绝对为著主的权益，毫不分心。（33。）在这愿望中，他表达了主对蒙祂呼召之人的渴望。
9In verse 7 Paul says, “But I wish all men to be even as myself; but each has his own gift from God, one of this kind, another of that.” Since the Apostle Paul is so absolute for the Lord and His economy, he wishes all men to be as he is (v. 8). He desires them not to marry but to remain as he that they also may be absolute for the Lord’s interests without distraction (vv. 33,35). In this wish he expresses the Lord’s aspiration concerning His called ones.
10在基督里的信徒能不嫁娶，乃在于从神来的恩赐。（太十九10～12。）凡没有接受这样恩赐的人，最好是嫁娶。（林前七9。）这全在于我们从神得来的恩赐。人若没有不嫁不娶的恩赐，而刻意禁止嫁娶，就会面临难处，并且可能破坏自己。婚姻生活是麻烦的。但人若没有不嫁不娶的恩赐、能力，那人就该嫁娶，并接受麻烦。不然，选择不嫁不娶，可能有更大的难处。
10For a believer in Christ to be able not to marry is a gift from God (Matt. 19:10-12). For those who have not received such a gift, it is better to marry (1 Cor. 7:9). It all depends upon the gift we have received from God. If a person does not have the gift not to marry and yet deliberately refrains from marrying, he will face difficulties and may damage himself. Married life is troublesome. But if anyone does not have the gift, the ability, not to marry, that one should marry and accept its troubles. Otherwise, by choosing not to be married, he may have even greater difficulties
五 保持不结婚倒好
E. Good to Remain Unmarried
11八节说，『我对未婚的和寡妇说，若他们常像我就好。』这是使徒在早期尽职时的愿望和意见。（7，25，。）以后，他看见实际的结果，就嘱咐年轻的寡妇要嫁人。（提前五11～15，与14注1。）照著保罗在林前五章八节的话，信徒保持不结婚倒好。然而，我们不能没有从主接受所需的恩赐，而履行这话。在二十六节保罗说，『因现今的艰难，我以为人最好保持现状。』这里保罗指明，因现今的艰难，童身的人最好不结婚。现今，原文可指目前的某件事，豫示并引进要来的事。现今的艰难或需要，指明更多的痛苦要来，就如主在马太二十四章八节、十九节、二十一节所豫言的。艰难的意思是压力，困窘；因此是艰难、痛苦。这是指今世生活的需要，束缚并压迫人，并且成了人的艰难和痛苦。所以，保持不结婚倒好。（林前七27，40上。）
11Verse 8 says, “But I say to the unmarried and to the widows, It is good for them if they remain even as I.” This was the apostle’s wish and opinion in his earlier ministry (vv. 7, 25, 40). Later, after witnessing the 40 actual outcome, he charged young widows to marry (1 Tim. 5:11-15). According to Paul’sword in this verse, it is good for a believer to remain unmarried. However, we are not able to fulfill this word without receiving the necessary gift from the Lord. In verse 26 Paul says, “I consider then that this is good because of the present necessity, that it is good for a man to be as he is.” Here Paul indicates that, because of the present necessity, it is good for virgins not to marry. The Greek word for present may also mean that the presence of a certain thing foreshadows and inaugurates something to come. The present necessity or distress indicates more anguish to come, as prophesied by the Lord in Matthew 24:8, 19, and 21. The word rendered necessity means force, constraint; hence, distress, anguish. It refers to the needs of the life in the present age, the demand of which constrains and presses people and becomes a distress and anguish to them. Therefore, it is good to remain unmarried (vv. 27, 40a).
12六 若不能自制，倒不如嫁娶在九节保罗说，『但他们若不能自制，就可以嫁娶，与其欲火中烧，倒不如嫁娶为妙。』照著这节，人若没有自制，那人倒不如嫁娶。这里的自制，原文也是节制的意思。同辞用在九章二十五节，说到运动员在豫备比赛的期间，禁戒肉体的放纵。
12F. Better to Marry If Lacking Self-control In verse 9 Paul says, “But if they do not have self - control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn.” According to this verse, if someone does not have self - control, it is better for that one to marry. The Greek word for self - control here also means continency. The same Greek word is used in 9:25 for athletes abstaining from sensual indulgences during preparation for the games.
13七 维持婚姻，叫不信的一方得救在七章十三至十四节保罗说，『妻子有不信的丈夫，丈夫也情愿和她同住，她就不要离弃丈夫。因为不信的丈夫，就因著妻子被圣别，并且不信的妻子，也因著弟兄被圣别；不然，你们的儿女就不洁净，但如今他们是圣别的了。』在十六节保罗说到妻子可能救她的丈夫，或者丈夫可能救他的妻子。这里有维持婚姻，叫不信的一方得救的原则。这就是说，与不信者结婚的信徒，不该发起放弃那婚姻。他不该寻求改变自己的身分，反而要留在婚姻生活中，为要救不信的一方。在十四节保罗说到，不信的丈夫因著妻子被圣别，以及不信的妻子因著丈夫被圣别。被圣别，就是成为圣别，为著神的定旨分别归神。信主的妻子既是属于主，并为著主的，她不信的丈夫也就成为圣别，被圣别，分别归神，因为他是为著他的妻子，而他的妻子是属于神，并为著神的。这就像殿与坛使联于牠们的凡俗之物成为圣别。（太二三17，。）同样的原则也适用于不信的妻子和儿女。这样被圣别，不是指人得救了；乃像食物藉圣徒的祷告得以圣别，与救恩无关。（提前四5。）得救的人是圣别的人，是圣徒。凡联于他，和为著他的，也都因著他而成为圣别。
13G. Remaining in Marriage That the Unbelieving Party May Be Saved In verses 13 and 14 Paul says, “And a wife who has an unbelieving husband and he consents to dwell with her, let her not leave her husband. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the brother; otherwise your children are unclean, but now they are holy.” In verse 16 Paul refers to the possibility of a wife saving her husband, or of a husband saving his wife. Here we have the principle of remaining in marriage that the unbelieving party may be saved. This means that a believer who is married to an unbeliever should not take the initiative to give up that marriage. Instead of seeking to change his status, he should remain in the married life in order to save the unbelieving party. In verse 14 Paul speaks of an unbelieving husband being sanctified by the wife and an unbelieving wife being sanctified by the husband. To be sanctified is to be made holy, separated unto God for His purpose. As the believing wife is of the Lord and for the Lord, so her unbelieving husband is made holy, sanctified, separated unto God, because he is for his wife, who is of and for God. It is similar to the temple and the altar making the common things holy when they are attached to them (Matt. 23:17, 19 19). The same principle applies to the unbelieving wife and the children. To be sanctified in this way does not mean the person is saved, just as the sanctification of food through the saints’ prayer has nothing to do with salvation (1 Tim. 4:5).
八 不信的一方可离去，叫信的一方活在平安里
H. The Unbelieving Party Being Allowed to Leave So That the Believing Party May Live in Peace
14在林前七章十五节保罗继续说，『倘若那不信的人离去，就由他离去罢；无论是弟兄、是姊妹，在这种情形之下，都不必受束缚，然而神已经在平安里召了我们。』束缚，直译，奴役。当不信的人离开信徒时，信徒不必受束缚，可以脱离与不信之人的婚姻。照著这节，『神已经在平安里召了我们。』神在祂的救恩中，已经在平安的范围和元素里召我们归向祂；因此，我们该活在这平安中。倘若在婚姻中，不信的一方要离开，我们该让他去。然而，神既已在平安里召了我们，为了使我们能活在这平安里，只要对方情愿留下，（13，）神就不要我们发起分开。以下几节（16～24）都是基于神已经在平安里召了我们。十六节开头的『况且』指明十六至二十四节是解释前面的话，就是『神已经在平安里召了我们』。要留在这平安里，我们必须遵守十六至二十四节的话。
14In verse 1 5 Paul goes on to say, “But if the unbelieving one separates, let him be separated; the brother or the sister is not enslaved in such cases; but God has called us in peace.” To be not enslaved here means not under bondage, but freed from the marriage of a believer with an unbeliever, when the unbeliever leaves the believer. According to this verse, “God has called us in peace.” God in His salvation has called us to Him in the sphere and element of peace. Hence, we should live in this peace. If the unbelieving party in our marriage desires to leave, we should allow it. But in order that we may live in the peace in which God has called us, God does not want us to initiate any separation as long as the other party consents to remain (v. 13). The following verses (vv. 16-24) are based upon this, that God has called us in peace. The word “for” at the beginning of verse 16 indicates that verses 16 through 24 are an explanation of the statement that God has called us in peace. To remain in this peace we must keep the word in verses 16 through 24.
15在十六节保罗问：『况且你这作妻子的，怎么知道能不能救你的丈夫？你这作丈夫的，怎么知道能不能救你的妻子？』因为我们不知道能不能救不信的丈夫或妻子，所以我们不该坚持他们的去留。神要我们留在蒙祂呼召时的身分里，（20，24，）不要发起任何改变。所以，我们该把整个事情留给不信的一方。
15In verse 16 Paul asks, “For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?” Since we do not know whether we shall save our unbelieving husband or wife, we should not insist that they remain with us, nor that they leave. God wants us to remain in the state in which He called us (vv. 20, 24), not to initiate any change. Therefore, we should leave the entire matter to the unbelieving party
九 留在我们蒙召时的身分里
I. Remaining in the Status of Our Calling
16在二十节保罗宣告：『各人在甚么身分里蒙召，仍要留于这身分。』这里我们看见，我们该留在我们蒙召时的身分里。我们蒙召时若已结婚，就该维持婚姻。同样，我们蒙召时若没有结婚，倘若可能，保持不结婚更是好。二十四节说，『弟兄们，你们各人是在甚么身分里蒙召，仍要与神一同留在这身分里。』信徒蒙召后，外面的身分不需要改变，里面的光景却需要改变，就是从无神改变到有神同在，使他们不论在甚么身分里，都与神是一，并有神与他们同在。
16In verse 20 Paul declares, “Each one, in the calling in which he was called, in this let him remain.” Here we see that we should remain in the status of our calling. If we were married when called, we should remain in marriage. Likewise, if we were unmarried when called, it is better, if possible, to remain unmarried. Verse 24 says, “Each one, brothers, in what state he was called, in this let him remain with God.” After being called, the believers do not need to change their outward status, but they do need to have a change in their inward condition, that is, from being without God to being with God, in order to be one with God and have God with them in their state, whatever it may be
十 寻求为著主的事罣虑，没有其他的罣虑
J. Seeking to Care for the Things of the Lord without Other Cares
17这里另一个原则是，为著主的事和主的权益罣虑，没有任何其他的罣虑。三十二节说，『我愿你们无所罣虑。没有娶妻的，是为主的事罣虑，想怎样讨主喜悦。』在三十三节保罗指出，娶了妻的，是为世上的事罣虑，想怎样讨妻子喜悦。结果，他就分心了。分心，原文直译，分开。要讨妻子喜悦的人，会在主的事上分心，与主的事分开。（35。）
17Another principle here is to care for the things of the Lord and for the Lord’sin te rests without having any other care. Verse 32 says, “But I desire you to be without care. The unmarried cares for the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord.” In verse 33 Paul points out that the one who is married cares for the things of the world and how to please his wife. As a result, he is distracted. The Greek word translated distracted literally means divided. A man who would please his wife is distracted, divided, from the things of the Lord (v. 35
十一 殷勤服事主，没有分心的事
K. Waiting on the Lord without Distraction
18三十五节说，『我说这话，是为你们自己的益处；不是要牢笼你们，乃是要叫你们行合宜的事，得以殷勤服事主，没有分心的事。』牢笼，原文意即用网罗纠缠你们，强迫你们顺从我的话。保罗的心意不是要牢笼圣徒，乃是要他们殷勤服事主，没有分心的事。在婚姻生活中有分心的事。已婚的人总会有分心的事。
18Verse 35 says, “But I say this for your own profit, not that I may put a noose on you, but for that which is comely and waiting on the Lord without distraction.” The Greek word rendered “put a noose on” means to entangle with a snare, to constrain to obey one’sword. It was not Paul’sin tent i on to put a noose on the saints, but that they may wait on the Lord without distraction. There are distractions in married life. A married person will always have distractions
19十二 叫自己的童身女儿出嫁是好，不叫她出嫁更是好在三十七至三十八节保罗说，『但他若心里坚定，没有不得已的事，对自己的意思又有主权，心里也决定了留下自己的童身女儿，如此行也好。这样看来，叫自己的
19L. Doing Well by Giving One’s Virginity in Marriage, and Doing Better by Deciding to Keep One’s Virginity In verses 37 and 38 Paul says, “But he who stands firm in his heart, not having necessity, but has authority over his own will and has decided this in his own heart to keep his own virginity, he will do well. So then both he who gives his own virginity in marriage does well, and he who
2036童身女儿出嫁是好，不叫她出嫁更是好。』照著三十六节，若有需要，人叫自己的童身女儿出嫁，并没有错。
20
21若有需要，人可叫自己的童身女儿出嫁。然而，留下自己的童身女儿更是好。保罗的话指明，保持不结婚更是好。然而，我们必须记得，这在于各人从主得来的恩赐。
21does not give it in marriage will do better.” In verses through 38 virgin refers both to male and female, as in verse 25. According to verse 36, there is nothing wrong, if need requires, for one to give his virginity in marriage.
22
22Verses 36 through 38 have also been translated as follows: “But if anyone thinks that he is behaving unbecomingly toward his virgin daughter, if she be past the bloom of youth and need so requires, let him do what he wishes, he does not sin; let them marry. But he who stands firm in his heart, not having necessity, but has authority over his own will and has decided this in his own heart to keep his own virgin daughter, he will do well. So then both he who gives his own virgin daughter in marriage does well, and he who does not give her in marriage will do better.” Most translators prefer this translation. But according to the expressions in these verses and the context of the chapter, especially verses 25 through 28, the translation in the Recovery Version is more logical. John Nelson Darby in his New Translation of the Bible takes this view. If need requires, a virgin, male or female, may give oneself to marriage. This is to do well. However, to keep one’s virginity is to do better. Paul’sword indicates that it is better to remain unmarried. However, we must remember that this depends upon the gift each one has received from the Lord
十三 丈夫死后，妻子可以自由嫁人，只是要嫁在主里的人
M. After the Death of Her Husband a Wife Being Free to Be Married Only to One in the Lord
23关于再婚，保罗在三十九节说，『丈夫活著的时候，妻子是被束缚的；丈夫若睡了，妻子就可以自由，随愿嫁人，只是要嫁在主里的人。』丈夫死后，妻子可以自由嫁给别人，只是要嫁在主里的人。这是关于婚姻生活另一个基本原则。
23Concerning remarriage, Paul says in verse 39, “A wife is bound for so long a time as her husband lives; but if the husband should sleep, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.” After her husband dies, a wife is free to be married to another, only in the Lord. This is another basic principle concerning married life
24保罗说明这一切原则，就答覆了哥林多那些崇尚哲学的信徒所题关于婚姻的问题。各种问题的解答见于这些原则。为这缘故，我们研读这些原则是有益的。这会解答我们关于婚姻的许多问题。
24By setting forth all these principles, Paul answered the questions concerning marriage raised by the philosophical believers at Corinth. The answers to the various questions are found in the principles. For this reason, it is profitable for us to study these principles. This will answer many of our questions about marriage