7谦让宜人与私图好争、贪图虚荣这两件保罗所题消极的事相对。谦让宜人也与发怨言、起争论相对。有些圣徒一直私图好争、贪图虚荣,而有些人常常发怨言、起争论。每当我们私图好争、贪图虚荣、发怨言、起争论的时候,就没有平静,没有安宁,没有谦让宜人。我从经历中已学到,活基督之生活的第一面是安宁。我们若活基督,就不会与别人争辩。我们会知道,甚至平静的话在甚么时候说才合宜;即使是平静的话,若在不当的时候说出来,也能助长争辩。有人得罪你,你若立即回答,你的话不会是谦让宜人的话。有人对你生气,最好不要说甚么。要操练谦让宜人,并等候适当的时候说平静的话。已婚的弟兄姊妹实行这点尤其重要。你的丈夫或妻子若好辩,要谨慎你说话的方式;甚至不要大声呼求主,这可能是智慧的,因为大声呼求主也可能激起麻烦。你外面不要说话,要使自己平静,里面呼求主,一直等到情况安宁才说。教导这点很容易,但实行相当困难。这样的生活需要恩典。一个弟兄的妻子对他生气时,他非常容易被激动。他也许怒发冲冠,他的情感也许沸腾。这样的时候,要平静、安宁极其困难。为此,我们需要主的恩典。要在这样的情况里谦让宜人,需要许多恩典。但我们若靠主的恩典操练平静,气氛至终会成为安宁的;然后才是合式说平静的话的时候。
7Forbearance is versus rivalry and vainglory, two negative things mentioned by Paul. Forbearance is also opposed to murmurings and reasonings. Some saints are given to the pursuit of rivalry and vainglory, whereas others are given to murmurings and reasonings. Whenever we have rivalry, vainglory, murmurings, and reasonings, there is no calm, no tranquillity, no forbearance. From my experience I have learned that the first aspect of a life which lives Christ is tranquillity. If we live Christ, we shall not argue with others. We shall know what is the right time to speak even a calm word. Even a calm statement made at the wrong time can contribute to an argument. If you reply as soon as someone offends you, your word will not be one of forbearance. If someone is angry with you, it is best not to say anything. Exercise forbearance and wait for the right time to utter a calm word. It is especially important for married brothers and sisters to practice this. If your husband or wife is argumentative, be careful about the way you speak. It may be wise not even to call on the Lord aloud. Such a calling may stir up trouble. Instead of speaking outwardly, calm yourself, call on the Lord inwardly, and wait until the situation is tranquil before you say anything. It is easy to teach this, but it is quite difficult to practice it. To live in this way requires grace. When a brother’s wife is angry with him, it is very easy for him to be stirred up. He may bristle with anger, and his emotions may boil over. At such a time it is extremely difficult to calm down and be tranquil. For this, we need the Lord’s grace. It takes much grace to be forbearing in this kind of situation. But if we exercise to be calm by the Lord’s grace, the atmosphere will eventually become tranquil. Then there will come a proper time to speak a calm word